Yuki no hi
by Kadabi
Summary: "Silence is a great healer." Sometimes she would dip her toes into a stream, sometimes she would find herself sprawled on her back in a field of flowers, sometimes she built a tiny headed snow man in the snow with a raven haired eight year old. And sometimes, just…sometimes, she found herself enjoying the silence of the moonlight with a taiyoukai.


_Yuki no hi_

"Silence is a great healer."

Kagome x Sesshomaru

PG-13  
PWP 

–*–  
Before Kagome had come to the Feudal Era she had enjoyed a quiet life, in a quiet town, with an even quieter (usually) family. There was only so much noise that two people plus a cat could make. Her mother didn't really count. So, sometimes – just…sometimes – when the noise of the Feudal Era became too much, and the sound of Inuyasha's voice was pushing her to purification she would find herself wandering into the quietest part that the forest had to offer.

Sometimes she would dip her toes into a stream, sometimes she would find herself sprawled on her back in a field of flowers, sometimes she built a tiny headed snow man in the snow with a raven haired eight year old. And…

And sometimes, just…sometimes, she found herself enjoying the silence of the moonlight with a taiyoukai.

She loved her merry little band of misfits, but sometimes the fighting was deafening. Inuyasha and Shippo, Miroku and Inuyasha, Kagome and Inuyasha. With the final battle suffocating every movement, Kikyo's death, and Inuyasha's self-loathing at a new high everyone was walking on egg shells. Her little merry band of misfits hadn't been merry in a very long time and it was taking a toll on her mental state. When Inuyasha's snide remarks and sharp tongue got to be too much and she began feel the purification licking at her fingertips, she had begun to fear that she would hurt Inuyasha in a fit of anger.

Before the Feudal Era, Kagome had never been such an angry person.

So she had begun to walk, and before long – as this tends to happen _a lot_ in the Feudal Era – she had found herself on the bad side of a youkai who intended to wear her like a skin suit, and – as this tends to happen _a lot _to Kagome – she found herself being tossed through the air and into the arms (arm?) of one of the inuyoukai brothers.

Unlike Inuyasha, there were no eggshells with Sesshomaru. He was an asshole. Kagome knew he was an asshole. Sesshomaru knew he was an asshole. So, they got along as great as someone like Kagome and someone like Sesshomaru could.

Which meant they spent a lot of time in utter silence.

Sesshomaru didn't waste words where they weren't necessary, and for months he found Kagome to be less than deserving of his words. For months she felt the same purification tension in her fingertips that she felt with Inuyasha, except instead of too much talk it was Sesshomaru's lack of talk. Inuyasha's damaged self-worth made him lash out at any hint of perceived insult, whereas Sesshomaru's overinflated sense of self had him completing ignoring Kagome as a being aside from a built in babysitter to Rin.

The silence had been cloying, at first. She struggled for the right words and then any words at all, finally she settled for mumbling and strangled sounds before falling into a defeated silence. Sesshomaru's aura made her skin feel tight and itchy, and she had thought conversation would make it easier to focus on anything else except the insistent need to burn him to hell. Except…her whole reason for being in the forest was for the silence, not for the conversation.

Sesshomaru's silence allowed her the safety of getting lost in thought, she was able to dip her toes in the river, fall into a field of flowers, or roll oddly shaped snowmen with Rin without the fear of being overtaken. She was able to ponder the mysteries of the universe at will now. Except, Kagome didn't have the time to be that philosophical and instead pondered on the situation with Inuyasha, the theft of the shards, the days leading up to – and the result of –Kikyo's death, and her odd little meetings with Sesshomaru.

She was able to sit shoulder to shoulder with the Lord of the West now, concentrate that purifying energy into a little ball at the core of her aura, and keep it balled up tight. She felt the frayed edges of her sanity smooth out, the tension in her neck and jaw eased and no longer ached, her fingers no longer twitched when Inuyasha went on one of his rampages. Kagome was realizing she had become just as chaotic as her merry little band of misfits, and was losing control.

Sesshomaru's silence had allowed her some retention over herself, even if it had taken him shoving her ever closer to the edge. She no longer felt the need to fill the silence, instead she of endless chatter she greeted him with a smile and nod. Not that she ever expected him to smile back, but they had moved from him speaking over her to Sesshomaru actually looking at her.

_It's something…_

Inuyasha had noticed the subtle changes in her as well, whereas before she tried to play peacekeeper and lift the mood with ceaseless positivity and stories this "new" Kagome no longer tried so hard to fill the emptiness with even emptier words. She had grown evasive and sneaky, and while she loathed that part of herself she didn't loathe it enough to give up that hard earned silence.

She had never thought of Sesshomaru as a patient youkai, and she realized with a start that if this was going on pre-Rin and Sesshomaru had to deal with her tantrums he probably would have melted her from the inside out and been done with it.

_It seems I'm not the only one with lessons to learn._

–*–

The eve of the last battle had come, and Kagome couldn't help but think it was all too fitting it was happening in the dead of winter when all the color was gone, and a terrible stillness had settled over the land.

There was no river to dip her toes in tonight, the fields of flowers had long been barren, and it was far too late in the night to awaken Rin to build a snowman with her.

A shiver raced up her spine, and she wrapped her arms tighter around her middle to preserve warmth. Sesshomaru's presence always sent a shiver up her spine, but she didn't dare turn to face him.

What was there to say?

She had snuck away as the dying light of the fire illuminated the faces of her friends. There was a terrible sick feeling lodged in her chest and no amount of joking and laughing over supper could dislodge it.

"Girl, wasn't it this time last year I found you in a similar situation?"

_Had it really been a year? _

A smile curved her lips, "Yes, minus the claw around my throat."

"Yet you still insist on walking the forests, alone, in the night. Inuyasha and I will not always be around to stop you from the reaper's kiss."

While his words were light, she felt the terrible sick feeling dislodge and sink somewhere low in her gut. Before she could stop it, her eyes welled with tears and she sucked a trembling lip between her teeth. She coughed slightly before she ended up drawing a ragged breath and bursting into tears.

"We don't stand a chance, do we?"

She heard Sesshomaru let out his breath slowly; there was no need for him to lie to her and she was counting on that. Supper with her merry band had been full of boasts and shit talking, with accentuated fist pumping and high jump kicks. She had choked on laughter with Sango but now, in the quiet of the night, she couldn't stop the surge of terror threatening to suffocate her.

"We stand just as much of a chance as Naraku. He may have numbers on his side, and most of the Shikon, but that is all he has. Naraku is a coward, and his allies are just as quick to cut his throat as they are ours. So, we may not stand as great of a chance as you wish, but yes, we do, have a chance."

For the first time in months she felt the surge of purification underneath her skin, and she wanted to scream at him that, that wasn't the answer she wanted. But, it was such a Sesshomaru answer she wasn't sure why she was so angry with him.

She closed her eyes and another shiver wracked her frame. She should be sleeping; she should be back at camp with Shippo and the others not in the middle of a forest in the Feudal Era with _Sesshomaru_.

A sob wracked her frame this time, and her knees buckled.

She felt an arm catch her about the waist, and she slumped against the chilly armor of the Lord of the West. Her arms had fallen to her side and she laid her cheek against Sesshomaru's breast plate, equal parts terrified and amazed.

The situation was overwhelming, and too cliché for words but at the moment all she wanted was the warmth radiating from Sesshomaru's fluffy and the reassurance that they weren't all going to die tomorrow.

She knew she wasn't going to get the latter from Sesshomaru, and so instead in a torrent of snowflakes with shakey fingers she raised her face to the Lord of the West's and buried frozen hands into a mane of silver. A flicker of wariness passed through his golden gaze and hesitation clamped tight in her stomach, but with the thought of impending doom pressing heavily on her mind Kagome closed the distance before her mind imagined poison claws mixed with Naraku's tentacles passing through her gut.

Her first thought was his lips were impossibly soft for a youkai, and a close second was, _ohmygodIhaven'tbeenusingchapstick_. She could feel the rumble in his chest; an entirely different feeling began to course through her veins and a hand tangled through her own raven mane of hair. Sesshomaru tugged just enough to tilt her head and gain dominance, tongue swiping across her bottom lip to gain access. Fangs brushed against her lips, she felt the skin split, and a drop of blood race down her chin.

She whimpered slightly as Sesshomaru pulled away, not yet ready to give up this once (because why would it ever happen again) in a lifetime moment. His fingers slipped through her hair, and she laid her hands on his breastplate.

She didn't dare look up, but she could see the mist of their breath mingling in the winter air and for the moment that was enough for her. Her eyes slid shut once more, and she rested her forehead with her hands.

She had a few hours left until sunrise, and they caught up to Naraku. There was a few hours until the end, _end of what? Naraku? Us?_, she had never been more unsure of anything in her life but for the moment she was content to kneel in the snow, Sesshomaru's arm draped across her shoulders, head against his chest, with no words left unsaid between them.

"Silence is a great healer."

A/N: Sesshomaru still only has one arm in this little ficlet hence the "arm" and not "arms."


End file.
